Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Miss Crankypants

I went with Fahjah for the monthly Sam's Club run to pick up paper towels and poo tickets in bulk the other day. I also purchased chocolate in bulk, and while eating my weight in flavored chocolates typically will soothe my winter ravaged soul, this time it's not working...the cold weather is settling in...my S.A.D. is kicking into high gear, and I've started stocking the fridge with Beamish and the bathroom with Nyquil.

No more Stretchy Pants Sunday (strutting our stuff from garage to front door clad in black, snug Underarmor). No more watching MN mow our lawn...MN. No more using cars as moving pylons. No more sweet, sweet beach cruiser. No more hammock in the three-season porch.

Only things we'll have for the next half a year (whimper)? Beer, bonfires, fluffy white snow, chili (with beans, of course...ammo) and flannel sheets. And the crankiest of residents at La Casa de Gasa. I'm escaping for a week in Tampa as soon as the New Year hits. Once I let her know, I'm sure my mom will be excitedly planning to do all my favorite things as soon as I get off the plane...Go to a Florida Wal-Mart, grocery shopping, bicycle 50 miles on the bike trail, check the mailbox for snakes, etc. I'm hoping if I show up at her house with a case of her favorite Leinie's (and bulk chocolate (Dove, Momma)), I might get off easy.

After my first hardcore season of motorcycling, I'm looking forward to winter this year with all the joy and silliness of a Silkwood shower.

...But I'd STILL rather live here than in Florida. We Cheeseheads may be a more weather-worn, hardy people, but at least we're laid back and delightfully redneck. Worst thing that happens here is somebody lights his friend's balls on fire.

5 comments:

  1. We had our first cold front blow in today. iGoogle tells me its 59 degrees outside at the moment. Is that true? Let me see. yeah. I guess it is. The saddest part of it for me is I'm losing my Utah ability to say, "it's not THAT cold." I hate cold. I hate snow. Yay Texas.

    The worst thing is lighting some poor rednecks balls on fire? Yeah, that happens here too I guess. Mind you, not in my circle of friends but probably in my exes.

    ReplyDelete
  2. After living 8 years or so in the "deep south," and now relocating to Peoria, IL, I can see the mood you are talking about settling in among the natives of the midwest. Just a couple of hours ago I actually got the stink-eye from a portly Lowe's employee when all I did was cause the automatic doors to open thereby unleashing a blast of 47 degree wind onto her rotundity. Is that a word?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Two words: GO BOWLING

    ReplyDelete
  4. With your gayer than gay matching bowling shirts?
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  5. Cheryl...what's your ex's #...he sounds fun!

    ReplyDelete