Regrets: A light-hearted look

Every elder in your life will tell you that to regret is to waste energy on something you can't change. Way I see it, for good or bad, they have introduced me to the person I am today. I feel real, knowledgeable, aware, and grateful to be where I am now. Nonetheless, there the regrets are. You either dwell on them or push them to the back of your mind. I like to dwell on regrets from time to time. Except to me, they are not bad, they just are. They're wishes, regrets, accomplishments, however you choose to look at them. Having said that, I decided to use the word "regret" because I'm going with a theme here.

Trish's recent post inadvertently wrestled a laundry list out of me. Instead of slapping a big old comment on her blog, I'll just add my list here.

• I regret that I was born with body hair.
• I might regret finally giving in to dating that first serious boyfriend after refusing him for a year and a half, but (since it didn't kill me), it only made me stronger.
• I regret that I inherited the "Kujawa Reef", as I'm now up to my boobs in the press, trying to fix the assembly I just had to yank on. NOTE: Sometimes too much cleaning is just too much.
• I regret that I stopped biting my nails...yeesh. You should see what they look like when they catch dry ink and fuser oil.
• I regret that I have not yet pulled the trigger on a second skydive. Now I know too much.
• I regret that my ideal tropical lifestyle doesn't involve heat, bugs, weird ocean greeblies, hot salt water or sand wadded up in that "panel" at the bottom of my swimming suit. Find me a tropical island that has a gentle, wispy breeze at a steady 75-80 degrees with low humidity and overcast skies. And a light tide.
• I regret that I burn first, then peel...then maybe tan. See above point.
• I regret that, while I want the next fun sports car, I am keeping the Saturn sedan because it's paid for. Being a grown-up is tough on the inner child.
  
• I regret that my closest friends and family REFUSE to drop everything and move in next door to me up here. Okay...maybe down the block a little...
• I regret that I didn't tell off that Catholic priest during the communion at my grandfather's funeral. It's not Tommy's fault he's Lutheran. In your hand, in your mouth...what difference does it make? The body of Christ ends up in the same place no matter what.
• I regret that I didn't become more financially conscious until now. Boy, money is nice when you have some to spare. See above previous point re: Car.
  
• I regret that I don't own a pair of stilts.
• I regret that Robot Chicken, a 15-minute stop-animation tv show, is more entertaining to me than a 4-hour presentation of "Planet Earth". But I blame the pop culture references as fodder for amusement. And there's an occasional fart.
• I regret I didn't have a camera on me when Mom and I went "poo-ticketing".
• I regret that I didn't catch on to the fact that one of the guys in the CVSC was nice enough to fill up my gas tank (while I was in the bathroom) before I tried to put 36 cents worth of fuel in it. Duh. For a moment there, I thought, "Holy hell! It's magic! 50 miles on and it's STILL FULL!" Double duh.

Huh...I'm actually smiling. That was fun. You try it!